Today we take Violet to see her ENT doctor for the finial check up before her surgery next month. I have tried to write about the coming surgery on and off all day. I wanted to write about how we decided that this is the right choice for our little girl, about how the thought of her going under general anesthetic for the first time makes me nervous, and how I was dealing with it. Now I’m not sure why I couldn’t find the words, perhaps as I get closer to the day I’ll find the words. Or perhaps I’ll find myself sitting down in the waiting room right a post about it.
What has been going through my mind all day is something Melissa posted on Facebook last night. It seems Kindergarten registration for violet begins in January. It seems so strange that my little first is starting full day kindergarten in less than a year. Her fourth birthday is less than 2 months away. I can’t help but wonder where my baby girl is going. For months she would complain when I call her my Baby girl, of course the complaints disappear when she wants daddy to carry her. Of course then I look at Jacob, who’s all exited by the prospect of having a few friends over for a Video Game party tomorrow while Mommy and Violet are at a baby shower. My baby boy has grown into a big boy.
It’s strange how it goes in spurts, for a while they stay tiny not seeming to grow and then you blink and they are running around, then taking and then they are off to school. Watching Jacob now, it seems to have slowed a bit, but you can see how his tastes are changing. From his love of Mario to his growing love of all thing super hero, still there are days I miss my little baby sleeping in my arms. Of course the one thing as a parent I can’t change is that my kids will grow up, all I can do is be there for them and let them know that I love them with all my heart.
And then one day your eldest will 39 and your youngest will be 35 (like mine) and you will look into the mirror saying, “God I look old. Where have the years gone?” and you will treasure every memory of your “little ones” even as you are proud of the adults they have become.
Nathaniel will happily sleep in Uncle Mike’s arms!